Did Someone Ask For My Musical Resume?

No?

Oh. Must’ve been me.

I am cracking myself up this morning and thought I’d share with you.

Of course, by setting it up that way I am really hoping that I’m not the only one who finds ME so funny this morning.

I had to write a bio for a little (okay, big) side project I am involved with which I am not giving you details on quite yet (but some of you regs may figure it out), and I thought it would be fun to post it here in its current form, in case I have to drastically change the final draft later on.

Without further ado:

Sadly, Melisa with one S was musically stunted as a small child by the presence of too much television. Listening to music was not something she did for fun but rather out of necessity, riding in the back of her parents’ VW Bug in the early- to mid-1970’s singing along to songs like “Delta Dawn”, “(You’re) Having My Baby” and “Afternoon Delight” (not necessarily in that order). She was given a Sony Walkman in December 1981, along with the Olivia Newton John “Physical” cassette, and no other tapes to speak of. It is for this very reason that she still knows the lyrics to all ten songs, especially her favorite track, “Silvery Rain”. In the early 1980’s she spent many afternoons listening to 8-track tapes with her younger sister, especially Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture” and the “Fiddler on the Roof” Broadway soundtrack. (No, seriously.) Then Michael Jackson dropped “Billie Jean”, MTV exploded, and her 80’s music obsession began. Every waking, non-school moment was spent watching MTV, waiting for her favorite Duran Duran, Berlin, and INXS videos to be played. She experienced one of the most emotional days of her life in late 1984 when her father’s co-worker invited her at the last minute to take an extra seat she had for Prince’s “Purple Rain” tour as it passed through a town that was three hours away that night, and then, later as she was putting the finishing touches on her outfit, was devastated to find out that the co-worker realized there wasn’t room for her in the car. She does not blame Prince for this tragedy in any way and, 25 years later, has mostly recovered from the extreme devastation of missing one of the greatest concert tours of all time. As Melisa grew older, the ’80s never strayed far from her heart but she expanded her musical preferences to include current pop, rock, alternative, electronica, techno, trance, house, world, dance, hip-hop, and especially 32-count workout mixes. On certain days, she wants to be Lady Gaga. You can find Melisa at her personal blog, Suburban Scrawl, on Twitter, and livestreaming a funny little show called “Suburban WoW” every other Friday with her good friend Weaselmomma.

All completely true, in case you were wondering.

E0EBC2C8393DAD4423FE9417A308918D

©2010 Suburban Scrawl

8 Comments

  • Ri, the Music Savvy Mom

    OMG…when I got to "Delta Dawn", I actually snorted. It was surprisingly loud and decidedly unladylike.

    bwahahahahahaha! xoxo

  • PJ Mullen

    I'd still totally blame Prince. If he weren't so popular there would have been plenty of room 🙂

  • Sue

    You got invited to go to Prince and then were dissed???? How did you get through this? I wouldn't blame you if you held a grudge for life!!!

    Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on? Could it be a faded rose from way gone by?
    Something like that anyway…..

  • melissa

    now i have all these stinking songs stuck in my head. afternoon delight. aaaaaaafternoon delight.
    delta dawn whats that flower you've got on? could it be, a faded rose from days gone byyy.
    thanks. a lot.
    p.s…that TOTALLY sucked about the prince concert. big donkey balls.
    xoxo

  • Oscar

    Delta Dawn… Those three songs used correctly can quickly induce vomiting. Look on any poisonous label. oh you poor kid.

    Thank god you overcam this torture.

    And BTW. Saw that Show in NYC. It was great! (sorry)

    I could be lady gaga. LOL