Note: This post is part of Fatherhood Friday at Dad Blogs, where all the cool kids are hanging out. (Moms are welcome over there!) Welcome to my visitors from DB; thanks for stopping in!
Someone I know (Not ME, mind you. Seriously.) had a complaint about her husband a long time ago. She said that it drove her nuts that he folded the laundry “wrong” (I guess that’d be “wrongly”, wouldn’t it?) and she eventually stopped “letting him” fold the laundry.
Are you kidding me?
First of all, sometimes people (men AND women) who have overbearing partners/spouses learn that, by doing things differently, i.e. “not how he/she wants”, they’re taking a short cut to less work because they know that the overbearing one will not tolerate that and will eventually just do the job themselves.
Secondly and more importantly, hey, that laundry DID get folded, right? So shut up and go do some dishes or something, instead of ragging about HOW it got folded.
I am the first to admit that I’m a control freak in many ways.
No, no…don’t try to argue with me. It’s true. Really! I am!
HOWEVER, I am smart enough to control my Control Freak tendencies when it comes to two very important facts:
1. People are different. They do things differently. Does the job get done? That’s the important thing.
2. If the differences occur between partners/spouses, the most important thing there is the teamwork. Is it teamwork when you’re giving the silent treatment because she didn’t chop the onions the way you do or because he put your mixing bowl away in the wrong cabinet? No. Did the onions get chopped and the bowl put away? Yes. So shut up.
I have met so many people/couples who fight about the petty little things like this. What does it get them? Heartache. I say, choose your battles. If there’s one thing Jim and I are known for as a couple, it’s how well we work together to get the job done. (Actually, we are known for many other wonderful things as a couple if I do say so myself, but I’ll save some of those for other posts)
So, the next time your partner/spouse does something in a way that is different from how you would do it? Bite your tongue.
And then thank them for doing the job.
P.S. Visitors: if you missed this week’s blunking of Nukedad, click on my header and read the three posts after this one too, from Wednesday and up. You might get a good laugh! (If you don’t, then I apologize.)